The following "Question" was asked by a member of the congregation at Grace Community Church in Panorama City, California, and "Answered" by their pastor, John MacArthur Jr. It was transcribed from the tape, GC 1301, titled "Bible Questions and Answers." A copy of the tape can be obtained by writing, Word of Grace, P.O. Box 4000, Panorama City, CA 91412 or by dialing toll free 1-800-55-GRACE.
Question
Why did God allow polygamy in the Old Testament?
Answer
Now, first of all, I want you to know that what God allows and what God wills are two different things—you understand that? You think God wills that any should perish? No… Does He allow some to go to Hell? Yes. Do you think God wills that you sin? No… Does He give you the freedom to do that? Yes.
God does not will polygamy! That’s multiple marriage: bigamy on to polygamy. Bigamy would be two married to one; polygamy would be ad infinitum?.
God’s standard is clear—Genesis 2—from the very, very beginning. When God made the first family, people, how many were in it? Two! That’s a rather significant statement, don’t you think? And in verse 23 of Genesis 2, Adam said, “This is now bone of my bones, flesh of my flesh; she shall be called ‘women’.” That’s a dignified name, beautiful name! The Greek word is ‘gune’… I don’t understand that, but anyway!
“She shall be called woman because she was taken out of man.” Now watch, here’s God’s standard for marriage, verse 24: “Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, cleave unto his wife, and they shall be”—what? “One flesh.” Nothing added. Nothing subtracted. Two people, one flesh. From the very beginning, folks, that was God’s plan.
You say, “Well, how did polygamy get started?” It got started in the reprobate line of Cain the murderer! Look at Genesis 4, if you’re there, and verse 23: “One of the sons of Cain,” in the Cainite family, “dwelt in the land of Nod on the east of Eden.” Cain produced some family and one of them was Lamech. Lamech was unbelievable. He was the first artist. Verse 23: “Lamech said unto his wives, Adah and Zillah”—that’s from A to Z. That’s his two wives, Adah and Zillah. “He said unto his wives, Adah and Zillah” and so forth. This is the first occasion of polygamy in the Bible and notice that it is in the line of Cain, the sinful line.
Monogamous marriage was always God’s will. But listen: in the Old Testament because of cultures, God allowed a certain developing process. Missionaries today face the same thing. There are many occasions when a missionary has gone to a certain tribal people and found that they engaged in polygamy. Well, you don’t just go in there and…here is a situation where a man and he’s got three wives and they have children and in their culture it’s established as a family unit. The women are dependent on him; they can’t be thrown out. What are you going to say? “Now that I’m here, everybody pick one; the rest, out!” Boy, that’s tough.
So, even in modern missions, there has had to be a certain period of time in toleration until the culture can work out of its system those kinds of things. And the way to approach it is to begin with the new and the young and give them direction and let the old phase itself out. In a similar way, once this thing got started in the cultures of the Old Testament period, God had to allow for it to work out as the message of God’s truth got into the hearts of those people. And God was patient in that area.
That doesn’t mean that’s God’s will. I’ll tell you something else: in the early days of the Bible, remember, the families were huge and they had their roots back. There were such great, big families—inclusive, consanguinal families (that word means “related by blood”). Families were so big that people were also marrying relatives. But they had to at the start. Did you know that Jacob married Leah and Rachel and they were his first cousins? Do you know that? That’s right! First cousins. You say, “That’s not right!” Later on in the mosaic economy, it wasn’t right. But it had to work its way out because during the patriarchal periods, there were huge groups of families living together! And that had to come in time. So, God patiently allowed for it to work out. But, I believe all polygamy and bigamy was sin. But, God allowed “a certain time of ignorance,” as the book of Acts says, for the working out of some of those cultural things.
Now, let me give you an illustration. Deuteronomy 21:15: “If a man have two wives, one beloved and another hated,”—and this is a verse people pick. “If a man have two wives, one beloved and another hated, and they have born him children, both the beloved and the hated, and if the firstborn son be hers that was hated, then it shall be when he makes his sons to inherit that which he has, that he may not make the son of the beloved firstborn before the son of the hated, which is indeed the firstborn.” Now that that’s clear, we’ll go on to verse 17.
“But he shall acknowledge the son of the hated for the firstborn by giving him a double portion of all that he has for he is the beginning of his strength; the right of the firstborn is his.” The point is this: you have two wives. Wife #1, you don’t like. Wife #2, you like. Both have sons; you’re prone to give the inheritance to the second wife, to her son, even though he is not the firstborn because you like that second wife better.
People say, “Well, here is God allowing bigamy.” No, not at all. The point here is simply this: here is a man who has two wives in his lifetime. The assumption is one has died, one is alive. He may not give the inheritance to the second though she is his beloved and maybe he’s long forgotten the first, but his inheritance must go to the first. It’s a situation here and if you study carefully through the text and through the verb forms that are used here, you will see that that is supported by the text. The word “had” is there. The word “was hated,” past tense, relative to that wife who has died.
And I’ll tell you, those who engaged in it suffered. Look at Solomon. He had so many wives and so many concubines and all of his political marriages, trying to—you know, the way to solve a problem with a neighboring country was take the daughter of whoever ran it or the neighboring tribe and marry her, make her a part of the deal. His life was a disaster and the kingdom of Israel was torn and split.
Believe me, God wanted monogamy. Look at his illustration in Hosea: he’s a faithful husband; Israel’s an unfaithful wife. That’s been God’s pattern all the way. One husband, one wife. No polygamy was ever good.
Let me give you what I think to be the most confusing relationship about this in the Old Testament. Genesis 29. Do you remember Jacob? Poor Jacob really got conned. He was looking for a wife—he probably was in too much a hurry to start with. Kind of got slowed down though. But, he was looking for a wife and in Genesis 29, “Jacob went on his journey and came to the land of the people of the East. He looked and beheld a well in the field and there were three flocks of sheep by it, for out of that well they watered the flocks”—Jacob’s well. “A great stone was on the well’s mouth, there where all flocks gathered. They rolled the stone from the well’s mouth, watered the sheep, put the stone again.”… “Jacob said unto them, ‘ My brethren, where are you from?’ And they said, ‘Of Heron are we,’ and he said unto them, ‘Hey, do you know Laban the son of Nahor?’ And they said, ‘We know him,’ and he said, ‘Well, is he all right?’ And they said, ‘He is well, and behold, Rachel his daughter cometh with the sheep!’
“He said, ‘Lo, it is yet high day. Neither is it time that the cattle should be gathered together. Water ye the sheep and go and feed them.’ And they said, ‘We cannot until all the flocks be gathered together, until they roll the stone from the well’s mouth; then, we water the sheep.’” Now, it seems to me that he was trying to get rid of everybody. “And while he yet spoke with them, Rachel came from her father’s sheep” for she kept them. “It came to pass when Jacob saw Rachel, the daughter of Laban, his mother’s brother”—see, first cousins—“and the sheep of Laban, his mother’s brother, that Jacob went near, rolled the stone from the well’s mouth, watered the flock of Laban, his mother’s brother. And Jacob kissed Rachel.”
You say, “He should not have done that. Why that’s—you don’t start like that! That comes later! …Wow, Jacob, are you ever forward. What kind of an act is that?” To add to that, he lifted up his voice and wept. I mean, he really gave a song and dance.
Well, what it was, was he was greeting his long-lost cousin! See? Right! Oh, that’s interesting… Verse 13: “It came to pass that when Laban heard the tidings of Jacob, his sister’s son, they embraced and kissed and he brought him to the house” and so forth and so forth. “And Laban said to him, “Surely you’re a bone of mine and flesh’” and so forth “and he bode the space of a month.” Right.
Verse 15: “And Laban said unto Jacob, ‘Because you are my brother, shouldest thou therefore serve me for nothing?’”: I mean, I can’t have you around for a month working for nothing; what would you like? “Laban had two daughters; the name of the elder was Leah and the name of the younger was Rachel. Leah was weak-eyed.” Now, we don’t know just exactly what that means, but in those days—we have some ideas—women were covered except for the face. And weak-eyed would mean basically homely. Could be cross-eyed… Which may be the best translation: Leah was cross-eyed. It’s a little tough to think about, but that’s… I mean, if all you’ve got going is—everything is covered but your… And they’re crossed. That’s, you know. Anyway.
So, Leah, Leah had a basic problem. And Rachel was beautiful and “well favored.” Rachel was just really beautiful. And Jacob loved Rachel and said, “I’ll serve you seven years for Rachel.” Laban said, “It’s better that I give her to thee than that I give her to another man”: you’re better than anyone I’ve met so far… Stick around.
Now, you know he loved her if he was going to work seven years… For Rachel. And I’m sure they enjoyed each other’s company for that period of time in a filial relationship. “And they seemed unto him but a few days for the love he had for her.” The seven years went by, he loved her so much—you know, we make a beautiful story of this! And it really is, you know; it’s a great, emotional love story.
“And Jacob said to Laban, ‘Give me my wife for my days are fulfilled that I may go in unto her!’”: it’s time for our marriage! “And Laban gathered together all the men of the place and they had a big feast. It came to pass in the evening, he took Leah his daughter and brought her to him and he went in unto her.”
He snuck Leah in there! And in verse 25: “It came to pass in the morning”—oh ho! Now, I don’t know what kind of a marriage ceremony they had in those days, but apparently the conjugal act itself constituted the ceremony and it was night! What a shock.
“In the morning, behold it was Leah.” I like that line! “Behold it was Leah. And he said to Laban, ‘What is this you’ve done to me? I served you for Rachel; you beguiled me!’ And Laban said, ‘It must not be so done in our country to give the younger before the firstborn’”: it’s a custom. It’s a rule we have here… Sorry.
Now he says in verse 27: “Work another seven years and I’ll give you Rachel.” Yeah, a little discouraging, right? “So Jacob did, fulfilled the week; gave him Rachel, his daughter, as his wife.” Now, I’m going to say something that you may not have heard before: I believe—stay with us—I believe that Jacob sinned. In my own heart, I believe he sinned in marrying Rachel. I believe God allows one wife. And even though Jacob received Leah, it was more important to be obedient to God’s pattern than to be emotionally satisfied.
Now, think about that. When somebody comes to me and says, “I’m leaving my wife because I don’t like her” that means nothing to me. There’s a right and a wrong and it’s right to stay married to the one you’re married to, not because you found somebody else more attractive. “He loved Rachel more than Leah and when the Lord saw that Leah was hated, He opened her womb and made Rachel’s barren.” God said, “I’ll bless you, Leah, and I’ll compensate for the love you’re not getting like you should get from Jacob” and she’s the one that produced the first four boys, the fourth of which was Judah—through Judah came whom? Jesus Christ, the Messiah.
God said, “I’ll bless you, Leah, in spite of him.” And I think that the anxieties and the anguish that were created in Jacob’s life as a result of this were because he was disobedient and willful and sinful in pursuing a marriage that God had tried to show him He didn’t want him to have, in spite of what he felt emotionally. It isn’t always necessary to be emotionally involved with the one you’re married to. You know, only in our culture do we function like that—in Western culture.
So, Jacob resented Leah… Made her feel unloved, but boy, she had the children! She had the children. The Lord gave her four sons: Reuben, Simeon, Levi, and Judah. She was never loved and she knew it. Verse 14, “Reuben went the days of wheat harvest”—Reuben, he loved his mother, Leah. He wanted his father to love his mother. So he got some mandrakes—you know, what does it say in the New American, “love apples”? Does it say that? That’s what they are. They believed it was some kind of a love potion, see. And so old Reuben was going to help his mother try to, you know, get her a place in his father’s love and so he got some love apples and brought them to his mother.
Rachel said to Leah, “Give me of thy son’s love apples,” supposedly a sexual stimulation. She said, “Is it a small matter that thou hast taken my husband?” Do you see there? In her mind, Leah says, “You took my husband.” You see? I think that’s how God looked at it. I think Leah walked with God. “And would you also take away my love apples”: wouldn’t you even let me go in unto him? Wouldn’t you even let me sleep with him? It’s not enough you’ve taken my love? Would you not allow me to be attractive? And Rachel said, “All right… He’ll lie with you tonight for your son’s mandrakes”: because of all the trouble he went to, it’s ok tonight.
You see, she wanted this so badly! And she was unfulfilled all her life. And then she bore Jacob the fifth son. In verse 19 “she conceived again” and the sixth son and God blessed her and verse 21 “she had a daughter named Dinah.” And then, finally, God remembered even Rachel. And she conceived and bore a son and called his name, what? Joseph. God is gracious, isn’t He? It wasn’t really Rachel’s problem; it was Jacob’s problem.
And all of that just to say this: do I believe God allows polygamy? Yes, I believe He allows it. Do I believe God wants it? No. In Old Testament times, he only allowed it. Today, there’s no reason for it. Our culture doesn’t acknowledge it. It is against the law—it is a crime—and I think that’s based upon an ethic that’s found in the Bible.
Added to Bible Bulletin Board's "MacArthur’s Questions and
Answers" by:
Tony Capoccia
Bible Bulletin Board
Box 119
Columbus, New Jersey, USA, 08022
Our websites: www.biblebb.com and www.gospelgems.com
Email: tony@biblebb.com
Online since 1986