The following "Question" was asked by a member of the congregation at Grace Community Church in Panorama City, California, and "Answered" by their pastor, John MacArthur Jr. It was transcribed from the tape, GC 70-5, titled "Bible Questions and Answers."  A copy of the tape can be obtained by writing, Word of Grace, P.O. Box 4000, Panorama City, CA 91412 or by dialing toll free 1-800-55-GRACE.  Copyright John MacArthur Jr., All Rights Reserved.

Question

I have a husband who is very scared to get up here and talk to you.  He's has a question, and that is "How do you personally know Jesus Christ?"  I mean it is such a struggle, I find the same question in my heart.  You know, I sit and I pray and I have answered prayers, but yet do we really know Him?  It's like, "I want to know you so bad."  You know?  Do you understand me?

Answer

Yes, I understand you--yes.  That's a wonderful question; it's a thrilling question, and if it makes you feel comfortable listen to this: this is Paul the Apostle, have you ever heard of him?  Not a bad Christian.  He's got to rank up there with the best.  This is his prayer; ok?  His prayer is this, "That I may know Him."  That I may know Him?  What in the world are you asking that for Paul?  You have known Him for years, you have given your life to His service.

I believe and I know that you know the gospel, and I know that you know what it is that Jesus died and rose again, and I know you believe that, and I know you have committed your life to Christ.  All you are manifesting, I believe, is the insatiable thirst of a true believer for the fullness of the knowledge of Christ.  That never goes away. 

Question (continued)

But that personal relationship--I don't know.  It's like climbing a rope and slipping down, and keep climbing because you want to get up there.

Answer (continued) 

Can any of you identify with that?  I can identify with that.  See, that's wonderful.  I have been a Christian a long time and I've learned some things in the Bible, and I could give you little answers about, well, "try this verse," and "do this and do that."  But the truth of the matter is you will all your life long; and the more you know about the Word of God and the more you walk with the Lord, the more down deep in your heart you will hunger to  know Him.  That's a pursuit of life, "That I may know Him," Paul says, and what about Him do you want to know?  "I want to know the power of His resurrection."  Do you ever feel impotent?  Do you ever feel like there are so many things you wish you could do, but you want to know the power to do them? 

Then he says, "That I may know the communion of his sufferings"  I mean, I want to be so close to Him that I hurt when He hurts; that I bear His reproach; that I feel His pain.  It's that longing for intimacy.  That's that "phelo" love--the love of intimacy, that cries out and says I want to know more than that You're my Savior.  I want to walk with You, and I want to sense Your power, and I want to see you moving in my life.  And if I may suggest to you, the way you see that is not by a feeling.  There are times when you feel the presence of the Lord (I don't doubt that), but I don't see the power of God and the fellowship with Christ, and the knowledge of Christ so much in what I feel, as I see it in what God does through me; what Christ does through me. 

When someone like you comes and says, "We've learned from you the Word of God," or as the other young man said a minute ago, "I have been coming and learning the Word of God, and I am growing."  See, then I say, there is the power the Christ.  I can see it when it comes through me and touches you--I can't see it in me alone.  Do you know what I am saying?  So, as you grow as a Christian, I have to tell you that appetite won't go away, hopefully, because that is the appetite (I believe) of a spiritual person--not of a fleshy one, and certainly not of an unregenerate one. 

So I think it's going to always be there, but you will begin to see, as the Spirit of God uses your spiritual gifts and uses your ministry, that the power is there and that God is using you, and that there are times when you do understand His sufferings; there are times when you are unjustly persecuted, and you will fellowship and commune with Him in his sufferings.  There are times when you will get literally angry because Jesus Christ is dishonored--like at Halloween and Christmas and Easter Bunnies, and that gets you upset.  Why?  Because you are protective of His holiness, and you are protective of the integrity of Scripture, and that all is part of the fellowship of communing with Christ. 

So, it is a life long pursuit.  When I was young, I used to (as a high school kid) read the mystics.  I used to read "Imitation of Life" by Thomas A'Kempis, and E. M. Bounds, "Power through Prayer."  Now these were guys who were real mystical.  You know, crying out to know the Lord, and praying, and wearing holes in the floor, with all these sort of deep, deep feelings towards knowing Christ.  And I did that because I thought something was missing in me because I seemed so shallow, and my Christian life seemed so pragmatic and it lacked mysticism (whatever that is), but I learned that I can best see His power and experience His fellowship as I move in ministry and see it as it touches other lives, and as it happens in that context.